Monday, April 24, 2006

I Forgot To Put A Quarter In The (Poetry) Meter

On jagged peaks lower than despair:
Sits a barefoot child,
Hair running wild,
And clear blue eyes looking out to nowhere.

I don’t remember what it was like then:
Maybe like a cloud,
So very proud,
And no one ever said just be like them.

We weren’t running in squares circled:
Happy and sate,
More food than plate,
And cheeks were not yet puffed and purpled.

But now the cheeks are running with blackest coal:
Mind is coiled,
Soul is soiled,
And we wipe the dirt with a snow-white prayer shawl.

Now the child cries out to a trans-parent:
Tongue is blistered,
Cry is whispered,
And things that normally are now aren’t.

Back home they all gather by the fireplace:
Toothy grins,
Washed from sins,
And no screeching scars on this higher-face.

Oh but no flame reflects in these blue eyes:
Only bland ice,
No salt or spice,
And warmth can only be found in a few lies.

The child is imprisoned in the grownup:
Keyless chains,
Horseless reins,
And purity lies in a pile of truth thrown up.

Purity was never easy for a pig to digest:
Like the flu,
Impromptu,
And you know even before the blood test.

So you are about to toss your cookies:
Chocolate chip,
Jumping ship,
And your child is two-to-one at the bookies.

A sign says: the blue eyes are forever closed:
You bet and lost,
At what a cost!
But signs always lie: the eyes only dozed.

bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbDo you believe in signs or do you believe in truth?
bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbIs it the man who bites the hand that feeds or is it the tooth?

16 Comments:

Blogger EATING POETRY said...

I believe in the truth, and in the man, though I don't think he has to bite the hand that feeds it, just reject it sometimes and find his own truth.

This poem is beautiful; it made me almost tear up... I can't even pick my favorite lines, because I love the whole poem, though I do like the reference to the Prayer shawl.

"But now the cheeks are running with blackest coal:
Mind is coiled,
Soul is soiled,
And we wipe the dirt with a snow-white prayer shawl."

I like how you tie-up a lot of your pieces with a line or two at the end, it always gives that small amount of clarity that illuminates the entire poem or article.

ep

4/25/2006 1:31 AM  
Blogger EATING POETRY said...

I believe in the truth, and in the man, though I don't think he has to bite the hand that feeds it, just reject it sometimes and find his own truth.

This poem is beautiful; it made me almost tear up... I can't even pick my favorite lines, because I love the whole poem, though I do like the reference to the Prayer shawl.

"But now the cheeks are running with blackest coal:
Mind is coiled,
Soul is soiled,
And we wipe the dirt with a snow-white prayer shawl."

I like how you tie-up a lot of your pieces with a line or two at the end, it always gives that small amount of clarity that illuminates the entire poem or article.

ep

4/25/2006 1:32 AM  
Anonymous the editor said...

"you bet and lost,
at what a cost!"

i dont really get how that "at" fits in. maybe "and"?

4/25/2006 7:29 AM  
Anonymous unblogged said...

anonymous, you dick, you happy now?!

4/25/2006 9:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

rappy editor, its correct.

4/26/2006 5:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm sure u smart people figured out i'm missing a letter, but for those who my mom likes to call 'special' that letter wud be a C for crappy. Word that is opposite to Jakeys poem.

4/26/2006 5:39 PM  
Blogger jakeyology said...

EP - thank you. i too find it difficult to pick a favorite.


Editor - the "at" implies continuation from the line before. read it like this: you bet and lost/ at (the expense of) what a cost! (a shocking revelation, hence the !): you bet and lost, at the cost of your (inner) child (you gotta be foolish - or childish - to bet your child - hence the shock).

from there on i lost all you commentators to the fatal attraction of writing that which no one understands.

4/27/2006 12:56 PM  
Anonymous editor said...

it just doesnt sound right. at cannot be followed by a question. even though "what a..." has almost turned into a noun, it's still not one yet.

4/27/2006 3:42 PM  
Blogger jakeyology said...

firstly, "at" can be followed by a question ("at what time?", "at which station?")

secondly, i didn't follow "at" with a question; i followed it with an exclamation. i think you are reading it wrong - in this case, "what" does not imply not knowing (a question), rather it implies not understanding (amazement, wonder, shock).

(the whole flow would be lost if "at what a cost" were a question.

i love explaining myself.)

4/27/2006 4:48 PM  
Anonymous Gregor Samsa said...

we'd actually appreciate some cliff note's to go along with your writing. we read and try to read between the lines, but when you don't know background information about the author, its difficult to discern the sodos of the writings.
O removed one, shower thy messages unto thee!

4/27/2006 5:48 PM  
Blogger Sculpt Me said...

im pretty cynical about the tooth, I tend to think it's the man that bit the hand... but hey sometimes, yea, the bark is worse than the bite.

I love your entire poem (like ma friend EP!)the 'wipe the dirt with a snow white prayer shawl' - i did that plenty, 'and warmth can only be found in a few lies' - when a person can't even be truthful to themselves, need to believe in their own lies, theyre in such a state of despair, 'things that normally are now aren't'...

I was wondering what the memory of a cloud referred to- (I dont remember what it was like then/ maybe like a cloud/ so very proud...)?
also, I was wondering if this is a personal poem? (are you the child?)

Kudos.

4/27/2006 11:32 PM  
Blogger Sculpt Me said...

Oh, and your linked to my blog now. :-)

4/27/2006 11:33 PM  
Blogger jakeyology said...

ok, here's what the poem means:

as you've probably noticed, there are two feelings running throughout -

1: the feeling of: "lower than despair", "blackest coal", "soiled", "dirt", "throw-up", "no keys", "no horses", "prison"... an altogether negative feeling.

2: the feeling of: "what it was like then", "proud, like a cloud", "grins, no sins", "sate and happy"... an altogether positive feeling.

the feelings are that of the Soul: now, in a world of pain and jaggedness, where the soil is held prisoner by the body, the feelings are most negative. when the Soul remembers "what it was like then", before it descended into a cold universe and would roam freely through the warm heavens, the feelings are most positive ("proud, like cloud" - fluffy and free - "more food than plate" - more energy than container - ).

the (inner) "child" - purity - in the poem is a metaphor for the Soul; and the "grownup" - like the "pig" - a metaphor for the body.

the "fireplace" and "higher-face" refer to the Source, Home, where the soul used to bask in the warmth of the "higher-face" (arich anpin - the kabbalistic "long-face", an extremely "high" level of spiritually; and "fire", flame, is the metaphor for Soul - hence "fireplace").

the "grownup" thinks the inner child (soul) is dead, because he sees its eyes are "closed". but, in truth, "the eyes only dozed": it only seems like the child is dead, but really the child is only ignored and forgotten - if we just shake it up a bit, show it some attention, "open our eyes", we would see that the soul merely dozes.

now, for the last two lines:

do you believe in the signs of the world - child is dead - or do you believe in truth - in truth, child only sleeps?

the last line is tricky - it has both a negative and positive feeling:

"is it the man or tooth" - positively it means: it's the man that bites the hand, not the tooth, so why blame the tooth, why blame the soul for all the pain, when it is really the body who bites? why blame the victim - child/purity - and not the victimizer - adult/scarred. negatively it means: the hand that feeds - spirit, energy, G-d, truth, essence, source(whichever term you feel comfortable with) - is being bit - that is, we do not acknowledge "life", we ignore our consciousness - and must therefore awake the (inner) child - soul.

phew!!! - longest comment ever; should be a post.

4/30/2006 4:57 PM  
Anonymous g. samsa said...

Thank you m'dear. That was a delightful inspiration.

5/01/2006 2:12 AM  
Anonymous gave up on editing said...

whos blaming the man? and anyway its the body you are talking about (i humbly think), not the man. the man is the meeting point of the soul and the body, and he is to blame.

5/01/2006 8:34 AM  
Blogger wandering said...

wow that shed a lot of light. It is cool that you were able to integrate all that chassidus into your poem...

5/03/2006 8:14 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home